One night after my friends and I finished swimming, we decided to put on a movie. We all got on the couch, opened the door and got some blankets and made ourselves comfortable. There was a list of moves that we could watch on my friends computer and I got to choose what movie we would watch. When I skimmed over the movie 'Into the wild' I asked what it was like. Some of my friends told me it was good, another said it was boring and another said that it was his favorite movie.
I had heard of the movie, but never watched it.
The movie it's self was amazing. At the end I found myself almost in tears and deeply disturbed. 'Alexander Supertramp' as he came to name himself was a genius. Some say he was crazy and suicidal. But I don't think that, I see him as a man on a mission. He was set out to find himself, leave society behind, he lived his last two years by no rules, no expectations. He stopped caring what people thought of him, he was living his life for him.
After the movie it got me thinking more then I have before, I had already started to reject society and it's conformist ways. I had always been a hermit, I hated going out trying to impress people, and worrying about what to wear and say.
It got me thinking more along the lines of: Why am I going the things that I am expected to do, and not the things I want?
Why can't I just drop everything and walk, go where I want, meet new amazing people, Live off the land? What is the point of working? When you die everything is worthless anyway. Why not make the most out of this life and do the things that you want to do?
I hardly have any bills, I only have a car because I need one, Or maybe I just have one because everyone else has a car. Maybe I have a laptop because everyone else has one, and maybe the only reason that I have a job is because it has been driven into me since I was young. "You must work, you need a job." Why? To work my ass off for things that I didn't realize I needed until someone told me?
It also got me thinking that when someone does go off to follow there dreams, and it does not have something to do with money, or a nice house, or finding a boyfriend or husband. They are labeled weird? Why are people with original thought and imagination rejected? Since when was it such a bad thing to be yourself? My closest friend's may think they know me but they don't. Truth is, I am afraid to show the real me on fear of being rejected. It hardly seems fair that I should have to hide the real Aimee Woodrow. I think that I may stop being what people expect me to be and be myself. Because if you don't accept me at my worst and weirdest, then you sure as hell don't deserve to know me at all.
I have come to the conclusion that there are no weird people in this world - Only original ones and they are a dying race.
This movie has stirred something deep within me. Most of my life I have felt like I have been waiting for something great to happen to me. Now more then ever I feel like I am meant for greater things.
When I think of my life and what I want to do with it, I am stumped. I simply don't know. Maybe, just maybe... I should walk 'Into the wild' Maybe I should just disappear, walk away from it all...
I have not been able to sleep well since I have watched this movie, there are so many other thoughts and emotions running through my mind I can not rest, when ever I try to put them in writing, or draw something, nothing happens. I am lost, in a world full of sheep.
I am planning on buying the book and the movie so I can watch and read it when I please. But for now, this is an amazing song from the movie, the lyrics are touching. Please watch.
Hope I have not scared you off with my deep and meaning full post.
Until next time.
-Aimee
I love the fire in your spirit, Aimee. You have the whole world before you -- grab it by the horns and make it yours (or by the testicles if you think you can hold on tightly enough).
ReplyDelete"I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did I wish to practice resignation, unless it was quite necessary. I wanted to live deep and suck all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan-like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner, and reduce it to its lowest terms, and, if it proved to be mean, why then to get the whole and genuine meanness of it, and publish its meanness to the world; or if it were sublime, to know it by experience, and be able to give a true account of it in my next excursion."
-Henry David Thoreau, "Walden"
You have all the potential in this world to do whatever it is you please. Cut the ties you have to where you are and just go. The earth will put a path in front of you which it feels you should walk down. Let her guide you to where you belong. Let her give you guidance to climb the highest peaks or to swim in the warmest sea's. You don't need this life you believe is necessary. All you need is the air that you breath and the earth we all walk on. Go on, be free. What are you waiting for?
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