One night after my friends and I finished swimming, we decided to put on a movie. We all got on the couch, opened the door and got some blankets and made ourselves comfortable. There was a list of moves that we could watch on my friends computer and I got to choose what movie we would watch. When I skimmed over the movie 'Into the wild' I asked what it was like. Some of my friends told me it was good, another said it was boring and another said that it was his favorite movie.
I had heard of the movie, but never watched it.
The movie it's self was amazing. At the end I found myself almost in tears and deeply disturbed. 'Alexander Supertramp' as he came to name himself was a genius. Some say he was crazy and suicidal. But I don't think that, I see him as a man on a mission. He was set out to find himself, leave society behind, he lived his last two years by no rules, no expectations. He stopped caring what people thought of him, he was living his life for him.
After the movie it got me thinking more then I have before, I had already started to reject society and it's conformist ways. I had always been a hermit, I hated going out trying to impress people, and worrying about what to wear and say.
It got me thinking more along the lines of: Why am I going the things that I am expected to do, and not the things I want?
Why can't I just drop everything and walk, go where I want, meet new amazing people, Live off the land? What is the point of working? When you die everything is worthless anyway. Why not make the most out of this life and do the things that you want to do?
I hardly have any bills, I only have a car because I need one, Or maybe I just have one because everyone else has a car. Maybe I have a laptop because everyone else has one, and maybe the only reason that I have a job is because it has been driven into me since I was young. "You must work, you need a job." Why? To work my ass off for things that I didn't realize I needed until someone told me?
It also got me thinking that when someone does go off to follow there dreams, and it does not have something to do with money, or a nice house, or finding a boyfriend or husband. They are labeled weird? Why are people with original thought and imagination rejected? Since when was it such a bad thing to be yourself? My closest friend's may think they know me but they don't. Truth is, I am afraid to show the real me on fear of being rejected. It hardly seems fair that I should have to hide the real Aimee Woodrow. I think that I may stop being what people expect me to be and be myself. Because if you don't accept me at my worst and weirdest, then you sure as hell don't deserve to know me at all.
I have come to the conclusion that there are no weird people in this world - Only original ones and they are a dying race.
This movie has stirred something deep within me. Most of my life I have felt like I have been waiting for something great to happen to me. Now more then ever I feel like I am meant for greater things.
When I think of my life and what I want to do with it, I am stumped. I simply don't know. Maybe, just maybe... I should walk 'Into the wild' Maybe I should just disappear, walk away from it all...
I have not been able to sleep well since I have watched this movie, there are so many other thoughts and emotions running through my mind I can not rest, when ever I try to put them in writing, or draw something, nothing happens. I am lost, in a world full of sheep.
I am planning on buying the book and the movie so I can watch and read it when I please. But for now, this is an amazing song from the movie, the lyrics are touching. Please watch.
Hope I have not scared you off with my deep and meaning full post.
Until next time.
-Aimee